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Lipstick. Why is it worn?
The assumption is that lipstick as with any other cosmetics is to make women and indeed on occasions for men throughout history, to become more desirable. To appear more alluring to the opposite number, and that such measures will assure acceptance, secure approval and eventually a shag. My wife has already wasted hundreds of pounds on the stuff, in that case. To her credit, she spends a lot of time on her appearance and ‘polishes’ up well. Only the other day she looked radiant when all signs of inexorable ageing had been skilfully concealed. She still makes my heart jump when I see her, hence the betablockers and hand held defribillator.
Men have worn lipstick in the past as fashion dictates, and for health. During King Charles reign and at the time of the aristocracy men would wear all kinds of blusher and long wigs. Why? Headlice, was rife amongst all people because they hadn’t invented insecticide shampoo, and as we all know, rampant parasites will destroy the good health of the scalp and cause hair loss and even death by anaemia in extreme cases if untreated. So long wigs and a rouge colour were used to hide a pallid and jaundiced complexion among the wealthy. In medieval times poor people always looked pale and drawn.
A modern example is ‘Badly drawn boy’.
So, my research bears out that facial colour or a ruddy cheeked person is associated with a healthy person, or plainly… a pisshead. Either way, make-up makes you look ‘healthier’ and being drunk means you don’t need to be too choosy anyway. This is how the human population perpetuates. Make-up and beer are essential for the world’s survival.
Lipstick is related to the human fascination or obsession with blood.
Jews sacrificed animals as part of their custom and drained the blood of animals. They were forbidden to drink blood as it was sacred. Judaism since the time of Moses teaches the draining of blood from animals into the ground. Ashes to ashes dust to dust. They believe Adam was made from the dust of the earth and his lifeblood as with all who die must have it returned to the earth. Jews today still will accept blood transfusions to preserve life in medical emergencies but will not eat pork or cloven hoofed animals because they are thought ‘unclean’. Also they believe that Satan and his demons have cloven hooves depicted by ancient Scribes who described the angels of darkness in the Pentateuch and the book of Revelation. I just don’t understand why the sheep must be separated from the goats when clearly both have cloven hooves? Apparently, Kosher eaters can eat locusts? But they were sent as a plague to Pharaoh? I’m confused.
The Jews also believe that a woman on her menstrual cycle is unclean for at least 7 days (The book of Leviticus) and she must not use the same towel that her husband uses for shaving during this time.
Pagans, Satanists and Occultists, love a drop of blood to drink. Warriors and barbarians would smear the blood of their enemies in times of victory all over each other. It was to signify that taking life from the vanquished made warlords invincible.
Shamans and witch doctors, Voodoo and ancient Celt have enjoyed ceremonies of drinking human blood to prolong the life of their community. Today we have aerobics and liposuction.
Early medicine prescribed leeches to be laid on skin to drink blood to effect a cure. This was called ‘Letting’. Other leeches who enjoy ‘letting’ are called landlords.
North American Indians will mix the blood of other fellow hunters to become ‘blood brother’s’ once again the significance of blood as a powerful force for strength and courage.
Corpses are given a makeover to make them look a lot better than before they died, which is a bit like rendering a house that has already become condemned, but who wants to die healthy anyway?
Lipstick is nothing to do with courtship ritual, but it is still a ritual for most insecure people. To make you feel pretty when you are born ugly. In Beverley Hills, ‘hags’ will go to any length to appear healthy and young by having one facelift after another. So, that when they try and smile their knickers wrap them up like a spinning window blind out of a Tom and Jerry cartoon.
Adam Ant wore lipstick as with other New Romantic pop bands of the eighties because he was a closet homosexual. It was a fact that he had often had his own ‘Ants’ in his pants. That bloke out of The Cure still thinks its cool to wear make up even if he looks like an old man who caught his head in a carwash.
Punkrockers, Goths, prove that makeup is purely ritual. A tribal expression to identify with other wankers who don’t have a job or know wear the fucking soap is.
Aborigine natives paint their bodies in chalk
just to make David Bowie look like a prick.
Lily Savage is one of those Transphroditeintellectuals and likes frocks because he is about as funny as athletes foot and the spitting image of Marilyn Monroe as she may have looked now and not died so prematurely. Cherie Blair wears lipstick that makes her look like she has been hit in the mouth with a meataxe.
A woman is usually already beautiful without all that crap they spread over their faces. Perhaps they should remember that a rabbit or mouse who had to wear that lipstick first, probably died in its cage, without even seeing the inside of a nightclub. Girls who dance in cages in those places haven’t a clue what lab rats go through. How many rodents do you see sliding up and down brass poles totally shaven, and expecting money stuffed in their thong? None.
Men don’t want painted trollops. They like natural fresh ‘roses and cream’ features. As long as the bikini line isn’t down by the knees that is. Unless, of course you are ‘Mature Lady’ and only receive incoming calls.
As for men who wear makeup. Make them go in the army. A lot of hairy arsed lonely men, sharing showers, and who spend too much time with each other looking at the male underwear section of mail order catalogues, staring at Y-fronts holding knobs with knuckles on, saying “NEXT.”
That should sort the batty boys out. I’m not homophobic. I used to love the ‘Village People”. That’s like saying I hate spotty teenagers. I used to be one. I’m in touch with my feminine side. I have a twin sister and we used to dress up sometimes, but I drew the line at lipstick. Then the Internet came along and I stopped all that. Anyway, I’m proud to be who I am, even if it does cut me under the arms sometimes, and it feels a bit itchy the next day.
Lipstick is the media expecting us to follow ideals of what tribal identity is all about.
If these glossy magazines had it their way we would all walk about looking like right clowns. It’s anarchic. Life is not a catwalk for everyone. Some of us work nightshifts and wear either work clothes or pyjamas. If we go out we are individuals. We are not slaves to fashion. Fuck the mainstream we like our disability. Don’t label me. (Only my overalls and pyjamas so they don’t get mixed up in the laundry with the other wheelchair users.)
If I want a magazine to tell me what to wear and what to eat and drink, think or say, or who to vote for, then I will buy the Watchtower and become a Java’s Whisker.
Just be yourself. Be thankful for what God has given you as long as you didn’t get it from someone else.
For example:
As for lipstick and lip salve how can you really tell the difference? If the cold sores don’t go away within two days. Send her out for a paper and change the locks.
Strawberry flavour should never be worn to accompany lager flavoured condoms. It tastes like a vultures crutch and I for one don’t think the manufacturers of both products didn’t think this through.
Lipstick is sexy until its left on my pillow case and my wife gets annoyed when it doesn’t always match any colour in her collection.
Ribena drunk too fast is a far more healthy option for lipstick and costs about the same leaving you refreshed and kissable. Pale nipples can be dipped in the strong cordial to give you that continental look. Rubbed on your ‘grey widow’s peak’ it can make you look years younger and make you smell like a sweetshop. Save money buy baptising your kids phones in the liquid. Hot Ribena is good for colds and sore throats, gargled with Pernod and some ‘charlie’ it will have you feeling right as rain.
Hedgehogs love it mixed with beer. Watch them try and cross the road while pissed without getting run over by a car.
Empty a bottle of Strawberry Ribena in your girlfriends bath while she is dozing there. Sit downstairs and wait for the screams.
Inject Blackcurrant Ribena into soft boiled eggs and watch your kids little faces. Ink is more effective.
Get an albino rabbit and soak over night in the above and leave to scurry into a local asylum for the mentally ill. Watch perfectly sane nurses take annual leave.
Children: Don’t try any of these methods at home. Wait until you have gone to school or visiting your probation officer.
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